If your ex wants to be “friends” — RUN TO THE NEAREST EXIT! Here’s Why

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Surviving A Breakup With An Ex

 

Everyone has survived at least one breakup in their life and it is never pretty.  Both people feel emotional and they may not know how to deal with themselves let alone each other.

If you or your ex are saying, “you mean so much to me still”, then that is a clear sign to stay away from each other.  You are both not responsible for how the other is feeling and the lines can get blurred very quickly when you are both emotional.  (Here’s a quick survival guide after a breakup)

This is how quite a few friends with benefits relationships begin and those are not helpful when a person is ready to start dating again. It will just make the inevitable much more difficult.

7 common (bullshit) reason people stay connected (and don’t do it)

these 7 reasons are adapted from one of my favorite books on how to survive a breakup, and basically it says “NO CONTACT” is the only proper answer: from Susan Elliott’s Getting Past Your Breakup. Or watch my video review on youtube here

  1. I just have one more thing to say
  2. I need closure

  3. I’m just so horny

  4. why can’t we be friends?
  5. I want to be available for reconciliation
  6. I just need to give his stuff back
  7. we run in the same circle

If you can’t stay away from the other person, keep distracted and meet new friends on Meetup.com, take a fitness class like Zumba , or Pilates, or try one of 15 other ideas here.

Are People Telling The Truth??

 

There are many people in the world who will say that they are friends with all of their exes.  However, is this really true??  Or are they saying it to make themselves feel better and make it seem like they care??

Even if the two of you were friends before the relationship began, there is no way that the two of you can go back to being just friends once you breakup.  You will never act the same way towards each other and there will always be jealousy when a new relationship begins whether yours or theirs.  

 

How To Deal With An Ex

 

Everyone should block their ex on Facebook, so that they are not tempted to “stalk” them and see what they are up to.  It’s a normal curiosity, but it will not help either of you heal.

If you have mutual friends, things may be tricky, but that is not something that you should worry about.  This is the time to worry about yourself and make sure that you are healing from the pain and grief of a breakup.  

It might get to the point where you lose a few friends, because you can no longer be near your ex.  This is okay, because you will continue to find new friends for a long time.  Besides, these friendships may rekindle after some time and the majority of the pain is gone from the breakup.  

While friendship is not possible right away, there may be a time that it is possible in the very distant future.

Is Friendship Possible In The Future??

 

While friendship is not possible right away, there may be a time that it is possible in the very distant future.  I’m not talking six months, more along the lines of 10-20 years.  I’m also not saying that it will be a besties forever friendship.  It will end up being a casual acquaintance relationship where you share pictures of each other’s kids or tell each other about a new job you just accepted.

While it may seem like friendship is possible, it is not, even in a perfect world.  There are so many emotions swirling around and you will need to do what is best for yourself.  The rest of the world does not matter.  Make sure that you are following what you need to do and not what someone else is telling you that you need to do.  

 

They are not living your life, you are.  So, make sure you are living the life that is best for you!

 

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